C++ Where only your friends can access your private parts
Caffiend
Calm down–It's only ones and zeroes
Campus Crusade for Cthulhu–It found me
Can you imagine a roast aardvark without an apple in its mouth? It's like a martini without the egg
Can you keep as much as half of your salary after taxes? Be sure that jackbooted thugs won't invade your home? Operate a car–let alone a handgun–without some bureaucrat's permission? No? Not much of a "free country", is it?
Beware of the Vampire Jesus–He gave his blood for you and he wants it all back now!
Beware the Grin Reaper [smiley face with teeth]
Beware! The teddy bears of today still carry the vestigial claws of their ancestors
BFA: Branch to False Assumption
The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 326 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean God doesn't love heterosexuals–He just thinks they need more supervision
The Bill of Rights goes too far–it should have stopped at "Congress shall make no law"
The Bill of Rights is over two hundred years old–at that age, I probably won't work either
Bill the Cat fan club
A billion here, a couple of billion there–first thing you know, it adds up to real money
A bird does not sing because it has an answer–it sings because it has a song
Bisexual, Proud, and Queer of it
Bisexual Separatist [picture of interlaced female symbol, smiley face, and male symbol]
Before my sword can pass through your neck it has to pass halfway through your neck. But before it can pass halfway through your neck, it has to pass a quarter of the way through your neck, and before it can do *that*…. —Xeno, Warrior Prince
Being a model means wearing clothes and not eating. I'd rather eat and take off my clothes.
Being a pain in the ass is a prerogative of the creative mind
Being depressed by the poor isn't much worse than being bored by the rich
Being in politics is like being a football coach–you have to be smart enough to understand the game and stupid enough to think it's important
Being sexy is a dirty job, but somebody's got to do it
Being weird isn't enough
Believing that you run the United States is a megalomanic delusion, especially if you're the President
Berserkers do it without thinking
The best defense is a strong offense, and I intend to start offending right now
The beauty of a pun is in the "OY!" of the beholder
Because cats read with their asses! [picture of cat sitting on book]
Because humans am stupid, that why
Because I'm the editor, that's why!
Because I'm the writer, that's why!
Because of heavy computing requirements we are currently using some of your unallocated brain capacity for backup processing. Please ignore any hallucinations, voices, or unusual dreams you may experience. Please avoid concentration intensive tasks until further notice. Thank you.
Because the alternative would be unthinkable
Beckett and Calavicci in '96 Putting right what once went wrong
