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- If God had wanted us to use metric, he would have given us ten fingers
- If you want an answer to that question, you'd better be bringing me chocolate
- If you want to see me, drop in any time. If you want to see my house, make an appointment
- I'm a bad thing that happens to good people
- I'm an atheist. It's a simple faith, but it comforts me.
- I'm completely human–on my mother's side
- I'm not a Goth–they just dress like me
- I'm not pompous, I'm pedantic. There's a difference.
- Imagine Escher drawing his own bath
- It doesn't have to make sense–it's library policy
- It took Windows to make me appreciate DOS
- It's the year 2000. Where's my flying car that folds up into a suitcase?
- I've done ISDN. It's so 20th century.
- I've had my weird shit quota for the week. Thank you.
- Lead me into the company of those who are seeking the truth and keep me out of the hands of those who have found it
- Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Sith Lords