Management

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Management
Book Six

Thus spake the master programmer:

“Let the programmer be many and the managers
few — then all will be productive.”

    6.1

    When managers hold endless meetings, the programmers write games. When
    accountants talk of quarterly profits, the development budget is about
    to be cut. When senior scientists talk blue sky, the clouds are about
    to roll in.

    Truly, this is not the Tao of Programming.

    When managers make commitments, game programs are ignored. When
    accountants make long-range plans, harmony and order are about to be
    restored. When senior scientists address the problems at hand, the
    problems will soon be solved.

    Truly, this is the Tao of Programming.

    6.2

    Why are programmers non-productive?
    Because their time is wasted in meetings.

    Why are programmers rebellious?
    Because the management interferes too much.

    Why are the programmers resigning one by one?
    Because they are burnt out.

    Having worked for poor management, they no longer value their jobs.

    6.3

    A manager was about to be fired, but a programmer who worked for him
    invented a new program that became popular and sold well. As a result,
    the manager retained his job.

    The manager tried to give the programmer a bonus, but the programmer
    refused it, saying, “I wrote the program because I though it was an
    interesting concept, and thus I expect no reward.”

    The manager, upon hearing this, remarked, “This programmer, though he
    holds a position of small esteem, understands well the proper duty of
    an employee. Lets promote him to the exalted position of management
    consultant!”

    But when told this, the programmer once more refused, saying, “I exist
    so that I can program. If I were promoted, I would do nothing but
    waste everyone’s time. Can I go now? I have a program that I’m
    working one.”

    6.4

    A manger went to his programmers and told them: “As regards to your
    work hours: you are going to have to come in at nine in the morning and
    leave at five in the afternoon.” At this, all of them became angry and
    several resigned on the spot.

    So the manager said: “All right, in that case you may set your own
    working hours, as long as you finish your projects on schedule.” The
    programmers, now satisfied, began to come in a noon and work to the wee
    hours of the morning.

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