An Australian, an Irishman and a Scouser were sitting in a bar.
There was only one other person in the bar. The three men kept looking
at this other man, for he seemed terribly familiar. They stared and
stared, wondering where they had seen him before when suddenly the
Irishman cried out: “My God! I know who that man is – its Jesus”!
The others looked again, and sure enough it was Jesus himself sitting
alone at a table.
The Irishman calls out across the lounge: “Hey! Hey you! Are you
Jesus”? Jesus looks over at him, smiles a small smile and nods his head
“yes I am Jesus” he says. Well, the Irishman calls the bartender over
and says to him: “I’d like you to give Jesus over a pint of Guinness
from me.” The bartended pours Jesus a Guinness, Jesus looks over, raises
his glass
in thanks and drinks.
Then the Australian calls out: “Oi You! D’ya reckon you’re Jesus or
what?” Jesus nods his head and says “Yes I am Jesus”. The Australian is
mighty impressed and has the bartender send over a pot of Fosters for
Jesus which Jesus accepts with pleasure.
The Scouser then calls out “Oi whack, would you be Jesus?” Jesus smiles
and says “Yes I am Jesus”. The Scouser beckons the bartender and tells
him to send over a pint of bitter for Jesus, which the bartender duly
does. As before, Jesus accepts the drink and smiles over at the table.
Finally, after finishing the drinks, Jesus leaves his seat and
approaches our three friends. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman
and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the
Irishman gives a cry of amazement. “Oh God! The arthritis is gone! The
arthritis I’ve had for 40 years is gone! It’s a miracle!!!!”
Jesus then shakes the Australian’s hand, thanking him for the lager.
Upon letting go, the Australian’s eyes widen in shock. “by jingo mate,
the
migraine! The migraine I’ve had for 10 years is completely gone – it’s
a miracle !!!!”
Jesus then approaches the Scouser who says: “Back off mate! I’m on
disability!”