Fear Of The Great Mole Rat?
Imagine What Your Life Would Be Like Without Zemmiphobia and Fear of the The Great Mole Rat!
Many people live a life crippled by their fear of The Great Mole Rat, barely able to subsist, never mind live a full wholesome life. To take a few tragic samples of statements by The Great Mole Rat Phobia sufferers from a noted internet bulletin board for zemmiphobiacs
“I am deathly afraid of The Great Mole Rat.
Please do not make fun of my mental illness.
Everynight I pray to god it does not eat me.”
Posted by: Julie and Becca at March 18, 2004 09:45 AM
“Shame on all of you, my poor son is terrified of The Great Mole Rat, every night i hear him screaming when it comes for him, i try to confort him but then he attacks me. Upon looking for information on the internet, to help my son with his fear, i came upon your sight and i am ashamed of you bad little people, mocking and distressing people with the fear of mole rat! You should act more maturally!”
Posted by: a very concerned mother at May 25, 2004 06:09 AM
“we hates him…we hates the mole rats. everytime timew we make cheese the mole rats come and we hates them. so we hides in the closets when the mole rats come for the cheeses. we hates them….
………………………WE HATES ALL THOSE TRIXI LITTLE F***ERS. we hates them.
today we sees them eating our cheese. we hates them. we wishes that we could taste the cheeses. but those moles rats eats them all. so we eats the nettles. they hurts us. we used to hates the nettles…and wack them with our nettle wacking sticks that we makes in our secret workshops. but now we eats them because we have none more cheese. we hates them. since most of our time is spent making cheese for the mole rats… we dont have much time for love makings, or climbing trees. or even playing with our fats, we loves our fats. OH NO…..MOLE RATS….RUN FOR YOU WORTHLESS CHEESE MAKING LIFE THAT THE MOLE RATS TAKE FROM US ANYWAY.AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
Signed the cheese people
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Truly heartbreaking.
What exactly is a Great Mole Rat?
This is actually a more common question than one would expect, primarily because most modern education systems have chosen to exclude this area of social ecology from syllabuses for fear of causing widespread panic and trauma in the more suggestible students. And one might cynically suggest for fear of lawsuits from parents unable to properly quell childrens’ fears about the The Great Mole Rat.
Another reason that there exists some confusion is that Zemmiphobia isn’t one phobia per se, The Great Mole Rat exists in many archetypal forms in the jungian collective subconcious, each more terrifying than the last, each just sitting, watching, whiskers twitching, waiting for that one moment of mental weakness that will allow them to manifest in corporeal form, thence to bite off toes, ears, or even in some extreme cases the entire heads of its victims.
(Please note that the image displayed alongside this article is of a naked mole rat as the visage of The Great Mole Rat is entirely too terrible to display on a public website)