Archie McPhee& Toys, Gifts &Novelties

It’s funny ’cause it’s true!!

There really are people out there who have been so wounded by life, so
betrayed, so abandoned, so very very hurt, that they can no longer have
any faith in themselves or trust in humanity. And instead retreat
scared and alone into darkened rooms behind closed curtains and locked
doors. There trying to find solace for the desperate heartaching desire
to belong and neverending loneliness in the companionship of animals.
Adding ever more and more like a drug addiction in a neverending
attempt to use them to cure a craving they Never. Ever. Can.

There really are crazy animal people who will never again know the
simple honest joys that can only be found in the company of others, who
will in all probability never know any real joy. Ever again.

Who instead are fated to live a humdrum unchanging daily routine of
ever diminishing return. Taunted by children, shunned, isolated, and
pitied by adults. Till death or insanity do them part.

It’s good that this doll exists, as it’s only through commercial
exploitation and mockery of the social archetype that is the pigeon
hole for so many lost souls that we can become comfortable with such
abnormailty and educate our children about it. They could in fact be
bought one of these dolls along with a set of these

and be encouraged to try a variety of different pychiatric techniques
to try and cure Crazy Cat Lady Action Figure of her intense and life
disabling social anxiety disorder.

Another idea they don’t seem to have thought of yet would a doll of
little girl from a war zone. She should have a little brother, and the
little brother should have a raggy bear with one eye missing, because
that always seems to be the case. And the girl doll should have a
string on the back. But when you pull it she says nothing. Nada.

Because she has become mute from the unspeakable horror she has witnessed.

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