{"id":12400692,"date":"2007-09-06T15:07:00","date_gmt":"2007-09-06T15:07:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/2007\/09\/06\/Doppler-Sex-Everything2-com\/"},"modified":"2007-11-25T23:56:34","modified_gmt":"2007-11-25T23:56:34","slug":"Doppler-Sex-Everything2-com","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/?p=12400692","title":{"rendered":"Doppler Sex@Everything2.com"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='sustuff'>Stumbleupon <a href='http:\/\/bunty.stumbleupon.com\/review\/12400692\/'>Review<\/a> of :<br \/>\n\t<a href='http:\/\/www.everything2.com\/index.pl?node_id=1764301'>http:\/\/www.everything2.com\/index.pl?node_id=1764301<\/a><a href='http:\/\/www.stumbleupon.com\/url\/www.everything2.com\/index.pl%3Fnode_id=1764301'><img src='http:\/\/bunty.tv\/images\/smallstumble.png'><\/a>\n<\/div>\n<p><\/p>\n<div align=\"center\"><img src=\"http:\/\/img249.imageshack.us\/img249\/6585\/blue201160iz9.jpg\" \/><\/div>\n<ul style=\"margin: 20px auto; padding: 10px; background: aliceblue; width: 600px; color: steelblue;\">Jacqueline Bisset. On a plane. When it was landing and you were supposed to be belted in. Imagine.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;Are you telling me you had sex with a woman on the airplane?<\/p>\n<p>Oh God, no. I&#8217;m telling a story. It&#8217;s a twenty-five year old guy we&#8217;re talking about.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;A story of what happened, or something made up?<\/p>\n<p>Both.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;That&#8217;s stupid.<\/p>\n<p>Flow with me for a minute. Pretend. Everything is moving too fast and it&#8217;s all redshifted, spalling away from me in Doppler distortion at the speed of light so it doesn&#8217;t seem as real anymore. Why not let it happen like you&#8217;re reading a book? Because it is. Because you are. It&#8217;s that way to me.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;It must have been uncomfortable being in that airplane lavatory. They&#8217;re barely big enough for one.<\/p>\n<p>We didn&#8217;t have sex.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211;Ah ha.<\/p>\n<p>Hang on &#8212; I have a hard time reading someone else&#8217;s words without thinking of a bunch of my own. I don&#8217;t know what I&#8217;m making up and what&#8217;s in the akashic record. While I&#8217;m sitting in a small commercial jet somewhere over Saint Louis Obispo watching the San Andreas fault slide under me, I get through a few pages and then silence the voice in my head by looking out the window. There are roads and buildings. Occasionally a glint of bright sunlight ricochets to me from a car on route five. I&#8217;m wallowing in cognitive dissonance. Only yesterday I was watching glaciers pass, yellow earplugs keeping out the propeller drone.<\/p>\n<p>There was a mighty uninhabited wasteland extending beneath me in all directions. Antarctica. No love. No warmth. No man&#8217;s land. I was on a flight from polar nowhere to a nowhere town where there are four women who each at some point in my five years of anti-polar deployment tried to become my ice wife.<\/p>\n<p>By the way &#8212; if I was on fire they&#8217;d let me burn. Turn down a woman&#8217;s advances, get lost forever. There are a lot of horses in the sea and they&#8217;re all dead and drowned. Ever see a stallion swim? They can, but it&#8217;s not pretty and neither are we after a while.<\/p>\n<p>I tried sitting with one of my former suitors at the galley and she squirmed and found a reason to get up for coffee and never came back as hard as she could.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve known her well enough to have had our eyes within an inch of each other and she doesn&#8217;t want to spend more than fifteen seconds saying &#8220;hi,&#8221; and twist the knife. They deal in a purified form of loneliness down there. Best to have work. Best to be busy, to have friends. Or an ice spouse.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Ice wife&#8221; works this way: you&#8217;re supposed to believe you might die in Antarctica and so with your remaining breath it&#8217;s better to love who&#8217;s within reach, body and soul, than hold out for the theory of survival and commitment to promises you&#8217;ve made back home.<\/p>\n<p>Yeah. Ok. Traveling salesmen have been cheating on their wives forever. Turn the smarmometer off before the needle bends off the scale.<\/p>\n<p>One tried to get me drunk. At a big station party she kept shoving cans of Canterbury Draught into my hand which I obligingly quaffed. They were only a kiwi buck a can, she had a lot of drinking money in her pocket and when the money was gone, she let me see she had the condiments necessary to complete the evening. I got scared. She started hooking her pinkie around mine.\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Stumbleupon Review of : http:\/\/www.everything2.com\/index.pl?node_id=1764301 Jacqueline Bisset. On a plane. When it was landing and you were supposed to be belted in. Imagine. &#8211;Are you telling me you had sex with a woman on the airplane? Oh God, no. I&#8217;m &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/?p=12400692\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":""},"categories":[1488],"tags":[316],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12400692"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=12400692"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12400692\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=12400692"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=12400692"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/su.blog.bunty.tv\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=12400692"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}